nervous to move to Saudi Arabia

CSim123 New member

5POSTS

15 years ago

Hello! I have been assigned to work in Saudi Arabia (by choice) and I am very nervous as to how female, westerners are treated.聽 Are there opportunities to make friends and go out to dinner?聽 What do you do for excercise, since women are expected to be covered up?

I have a very outgoing personality and I love to meet new people, but I am worried that I will have a hard time being submissive to the demands on females in this culutre.聽 Any thoughts or suggestions would be GREATLY appreciated.聽 Thanks

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Ramon1990 Contributor

138POSTS

15 years ago

Just chill! It's gonna be alright!

Alliecat ViP

8790POSTS

15 years ago

HiHi, CSim--Philly girl--and welcome to the forum!

Well, I'm sure you found Ramon's reply to be very helpful in calming your fears.

However, I do know what you're saying because how you described yourself is how I am, too.聽 There's so much to say about all of this.

I'm going to PM you--hope it's okay

501765410 Member

17POSTS

15 years ago

Hi Sim,

Im sure alliecat & ramon comments/PM will help a lot.
Saudi is very nice place to visit. You will not find big variantion but still you need to understand some basic laws & culture. Most of the things are permissible but in specific parameters. Please contact us if you need more details. you are always welcome.

Jin

FeeAcer ViP

6172POSTS

15 years ago

Hello CSim123, welcome to 大咖福利影院

Were will you be based in Saudi?

ahd Active member

64POSTS

15 years ago

Just take it easy CSim123

Ramon1990 Contributor

138POSTS

15 years ago

Alliecat wrote:
HiHi, CSim--Philly girl--and welcome to the forum!

Well, I'm sure you found Ramon's reply to be very helpful in calming your fears.

However, I do know what you're saying because how you described yourself is how I am, too.聽 There's so much to say about all of this.

I'm going to PM you--hope it's okay

Thank God you've got the sense of humor!

Pleasure to have you here, CSim123, and have fun in the KSA.

Ramon,

Alliecat ViP

8790POSTS

15 years ago

oh, the irony ... lol

CSim123 New member

5POSTS

15 years ago

I believe I will be living in the very center of SA.聽 I want to say that I will be in Riyad, but I can't confirm it yet.聽 I have until the 18th to decide if I want to change my life and head over there.聽 I'm very concerned about safety and finding people that I can connect to.聽 I have done a lot of research on the area and I am very worried that I will just be able to adjust to the role that women play.聽 Any tips or advice would be helpful.

As much as "just chill out" is great advice (insert smiley face here). I am looking for some very real and honest feedback.聽 This is quite the opportunity for me, but I don't want to take it if this is just the wrong place for a 28 year old, adrenaline junkie, female to be.

Ramon1990 Contributor

138POSTS

15 years ago

#10

Well, if you're not married, I don't think it'd be much fun here for you, unless you're Muslim, and can play by the rules. If you're planning on owning some money, and leave, you'd need to get some patience as well. There are a lot of Americans with their families here, in Riyadh, so, that should be helpful to pass the time, and get some fun. However, you'd need to be in a compound, which I think it's hard to get in there. I mean, there's something about being in the waiting list, and stuff like that.
Anyway, if you're a patient woman, you'd be just fine here.

Good luck.

Ramon,

musicman ViP

3180POSTS

15 years ago

#11

You have to get into the water if to find out whether you can swim

Alliecat ViP

8790POSTS

15 years ago

#12

musicman wrote:
You have to get into the water if to find out whether you can swim

Yeah but if you find out you can't swim, you DROWN!

CAF Serial expat

831POSTS

15 years ago

#13

CSM123, Welcome to the Forum!聽 Im from MD!!!

Im not sure about your background, but this 'could' be a great opportunity to grow in the job and learn first hand about the Saudi culture.聽 But you will have to come here with an open mind and alot of patience and realize that this ain't Philly!聽

KSA is probably unlike anywhere you have ever been.聽 BUT, if you can come here for the adventure, knowing you can do anything for a year, you will thrive.聽 It just takes a willingness to endure some differences and an effort to connect with people...聽 And you have already taken that first jump...聽 you met us!聽

聽聽Stay connected and participate with us here, read through the threads and you'll learn a ton about the do's and dont's...

Don't hesitate to PM me and we can chat.聽 We are here to help you transition and then to have fun with when you arrive.

Best of聽 luck with your decision...

PS.聽 I could use a good therapist from time to time.聽 LOL聽

CSim123 New member

5POSTS

15 years ago

#14

Hello CAF!聽 Than you for the information and happy late birthday.聽

I see that you are retired military - both of my parents are retired military also - I suppose that's where I get my "wonder lust" from.

I noticed that you said you like outdoor adventures (in your bio).聽 Have you been able to fulfill that need in KSA?聽 I am very fearful of feeling like I will have to be inside all day.聽 A weird concern, but for someone that's outdoors as much as possible, it is certainly something for me to think about.

CAF Serial expat

831POSTS

15 years ago

#15

CSim - Yes, as a Military child, you would get that way.聽

聽 All of my kids do the same thing... Always on looking for that next adventure...

As for your question, I absolutely love the outdoors (traveling, camping, boating, historic sites, etc), but to be perfectly honest, I haven't had the opportunity to explore the desert or camp yet.聽聽I have done some traveling, visited other countries and some historic sites around the region, which by the way was just awesome!聽 Ive traveled the US from Coast to Coast and now Im trying to do some traveling here in the聽 ME.聽 Its been really nice and I've only just begun.聽 We have another 18mo+ here to go.

As for your fear of being inside all day, don't fret.聽 You will be working all day and then hopefully you will have some friends to gather with in the evening...聽聽Im not sure of the job, or where you'll be working, but I have some Doctor friends that I could hook you up with.聽 They have all been here a while and love the place.聽聽

Your biggest question is, can you endure this place for a year?聽 I dont know where you lived while your folks were in the military, but I suspect you have an innate聽 ability to assimilate very well into any place you move to.聽聽When else would you get this opportunity?聽 The key is to negotiate a good package.聽 Don't sign anything until your sure you have all of your bases covered.聽 PM me and we can chat.

musicman ViP

3180POSTS

15 years ago

#16

The key here is to be able to latch on to a small group of friends who have similar interests and can share them together, be it indoors within the confines of a compound or even outdoors camping in the desert sands.

Theres much to see and enjoy across these Arabian lands.

Alliecat ViP

8790POSTS

15 years ago

#17

I've been in touch with CSIM and she's not in the same position as the rest of us.聽 Her job offer is with a 'private' Saudi family and there's a lot of things that aren't good about the offer, information she isn't being given, like, for example, where she will be living--which of course is critical to one's happiness here.聽

Her recruiters claim they can't tell her due to 'confidentiality issues' but I say that's b*llsh*t.聽 And, of course, something to always bear in mind about rectuiters is they are oftentimes more concerned with the fee they will receive than with the happiness of the person they are placing.聽

Also,聽 married women have an easier time of it here because they have husbands--never has being married been such a blessing as in Saudia, I think lol聽聽 CSIM is a single young woman so traveling would likely be a real headache for her.

I don't want to dissuade her but I sure don't want to sugarcoat anything, either.聽 She's got some hard thinking ahead of her and, the reality is, that she really doesn't have to stick it out a year if she finds the conditions intolerable.聽 People break contracts here all the time--they simply go on holiday and don't return.

The main issue, for me, is her safety and to feel that she will be safe, I really think she MUST know in advance where she'll be living.聽 I also think, if she does come, that she needs to get a multiple exit visa ASAP and not hand over her passport (certainly not to the head of a private Saudi family).

Opinions?

musicman ViP

3180POSTS

15 years ago

#18

Its a very difficult decision to make when you have to live within the confines of a local family under their total supervision, control, and sponsorship.

On a personal note, I wouldn't want to take up a job under these circumstances unless I know exactly where I will be staying, what freedoms of movement I will have and what my actual working hours and holiday benefits are.

501765410 Member

17POSTS

15 years ago

#19

Hi CSim123,

One small piece advice in your list.
Try to go to Jeddah or Al Khobar. Very nice & Interesting place & with alot tourist attraction. You can go outside freely to Sea sides, Malls, Recreation centers & Resturants etc
But for me i love Riyadh bcoz its my city & my life. Sometimes we move to Khobar or Jeddah for a mood change. Hope this added in ur info.

BR,
Jinz

501765410 Member

17POSTS

15 years ago

#20

Alliecat wrote:
I've been in touch with CSIM and she's not in the same position as the rest of us.聽 Her job offer is with a 'private' Saudi family and there's a lot of things that aren't good about the offer, information she isn't being given, like, for example, where she will be living--which of course is critical to one's happiness here.聽

Her recruiters claim they can't tell her due to 'confidentiality issues' but I say that's b*llsh*t.聽 And, of course, something to always bear in mind about rectuiters is they are oftentimes more concerned with the fee they will receive than with the happiness of the person they are placing.聽

Also,聽 married women have an easier time of it here because they have husbands--never has being married been such a blessing as in Saudia, I think lol聽聽 CSIM is a single young woman so traveling would likely be a real headache for her.

I don't want to dissuade her but I sure don't want to sugarcoat anything, either.聽 She's got some hard thinking ahead of her and, the reality is, that she really doesn't have to stick it out a year if she finds the conditions intolerable.聽 People break contracts here all the time--they simply go on holiday and don't return.

The main issue, for me, is her safety and to feel that she will be safe, I really think she MUST know in advance where she'll be living.聽 I also think, if she does come, that she needs to get a multiple exit visa ASAP and not hand over her passport (certainly not to the head of a private Saudi family).

Opinions?

100% Agreed

zb_kh Active member

40POSTS

15 years ago

#21

Saudi is a great place to be in if you're looking for clean fun. Take out booze,drugs and dating out of entertainment and there you have it.

ezzix Active member

52POSTS

15 years ago

#22

zb_kh wrote:
Saudi is a great place to be in if you're looking for clean fun. Take out booze,drugs and dating out of entertainment and there you have it.

and where is the entertainment?

happyexpat654 Active member

44POSTS

15 years ago

#23

take it easy.

zb_kh Active member

40POSTS

15 years ago

#24

ezzix wrote:
zb_kh wrote:
Saudi is a great place to be in if you're looking for clean fun. Take out booze,drugs and dating out of entertainment and there you have it.

and where is the entertainment?

I dont know where you live, but in khobar we play pool, we go fishing, boating, mall-hopping, driving, tennis, swimming, soccer, basketball, eating out, dune riding, picnicing, bowling, hookah bars etc etc

FeeAcer ViP

6172POSTS

15 years ago

#25

Well ezzix, the entertainment is what you organize!
We lived for nearly 9 years in Saudi Arabia and never ever were bored! Ok, no night clubs, no cinemas, no theatre but we would make parties in private inviting friends over for whatever occasion, making desert treks, visiting some interesting places as ruins, museum, forts, whatever. We even went on camping! weekends on the beach (I agree for Riyadh people the latter might be difficult!

) but there are so many things one can do for entertainment!

Alliecat ViP

8790POSTS

15 years ago

#26

zb_kh wrote:
ezzix wrote:
zb_kh wrote:
Saudi is a great place to be in if you're looking for clean fun. Take out booze,drugs and dating out of entertainment and there you have it.

and where is the entertainment?

I dont know where you live, but in khobar we play pool, we go fishing, boating, mall-hopping, driving, tennis, swimming, soccer, basketball, eating out, dune riding, picnicing, bowling, hookah bars etc etc

Lovely for YOU .. but most of the things you have mentioned women aren't allowed to do

zb_kh Active member

40POSTS

15 years ago

#27

awww come now.....you have mega malls all over the place...isnt shopping a woman's favorite pastime? and they have all sorts of neat places for women and families only too? What would you like to do for fun anyway? Lets hear your idea of fun..

Cynthia e Active member

41POSTS

15 years ago

#28

I am in total agreement with Alliecat.聽 Beware! Beware! Beware! No details given, no way! It is a culture shock for americans and canadians to begin with, and if she is with a Saudi family, this might be even more of a shock.聽 And, Alkhobar/Dammam, is much more open for females.聽 Many here do not even wear a hijab, and I have not seen them stopped when I have been in the malls. I suggest she finds out everything before making her decision.

zb_kh Active member

40POSTS

15 years ago

#29

True that saudi environment is the complete opposite of Western environment

For women it IS especially hard, considering the western environment they grew up in.

But believe it or not, there are other women who have been raised here and love the life in Saudi.

501765410 Member

17POSTS

15 years ago

#30

Wow lot of replies. It is an interesting topic

Well a piece of Advice. We should make a proper blog & everyone should contribute ideas on what we can do for entertainment, fun & relaxation with locations with detailed info.

For Example: Did you walk in the clouds? No I did.
There are green mountains in Abha city where you can find very cool places and surrounded by clouds. Its awsome and you will also find Cable Car between mountains.

Anyways. Lets hear from CSIM123 Did our comments helped you? Do you need more info?

Regards,
Jinz

sqahar Member

17POSTS

15 years ago

#31

your definition of entertainment keeps changing in Saudi. actually you start defining it as per the social requirements. for example, on one weekend i took a train to Dammam and came back in the evening. i could have flown or driven but i just wanted to have a train ride. it wasnt bad but not something you would consider doing for fun back home.

riyadh has grown on me slowly but certainly. im used to it now.

MisterStretch ViP

805POSTS

15 years ago

#32

A position with a private family and no details?

I wouldn't do it, considering it not safe.聽 Remember MM's post of a few weeks ago about the domestic that was mutilated and terrorized by her Saudi family?

Nope.

Wouldn't do or recommend it.