Retiring to the philippines to marry. page 2 - Philippines forum

Retiring to the philippines to marry.

gbdermid Active member

39POSTS

8 years ago

I have been to see my girl three times, for 3 months ,last year, I will be back in May this year for another month,聽 I am building聽 a house for us to live in on grandma's聽 property, I own a carabou聽 that I rent,,聽 I help all the family, but I know they keep me safe, and I don't聽 feel used

1 member reacted to this post

Bob604 Contributor

108POSTS

8 years ago

#42

Here is a passage from Silvercobra's earlier post in this forum.聽聽In my opinion, this is the truest statement in this whole thread.

"Ask yourself why a beautiful young woman, who could basically have anyone she wanted, choose a foreigner older than her father.
Nine times out of ten it is her pathway from poverty and little else.
Her family will agree to the union because with luck they will follow up the same path in her footsteps. "

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gbdermid Active member

39POSTS

8 years ago

#43

My wife is many years younger than I, I visit three times a year, for a month at a time, she always tells me first day is hers , then we act like an old married couple, in city she calls me daddy in public, but near family or in our town, every one knows me just as Sam's husband, they don't care about age, only how good her husband treats her,

samangelevski Banned

292POSTS

8 years ago

#44

Why will she chose foreigner over everyone, well simple here as you all know Guys do not give a sheet about a Girl, second she is more secure with older guy.

But lets see say she has one or more children, she will look for foreigner he will supply here with security, lets not make mistake security and Love is not one of the same, it can be and i hope in most cases after a while security turned in to love, i do believe people can learn to love each other,

And they you have a girl with no children single free to do as she pleases, educated have a good job, but yet she too choses older guy, is for single beautiful young Girl love and not so much in security as she can provide for her self easily,聽

So what gives here ???

I have heard this in public places to when a young Girl called her foreigner my daddy, at first i thought that what it was, but when you see them kiss then everything changed for me, I found it kind of silly, what is he calling her, my Child ???? I am not sure with some guys, but I find it offencive someone to call me Daddy if I sleep with them, it is morally wrong.

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gbdermid Active member

39POSTS

8 years ago

#45

Wow,where has he lived?, I have been to Bohol three times in 2017, my wife is 40 years younger than I,,we have much love for each other, I Love most of the food, not the seafood, fish has too many bones, I find things very safe compared to most cities in us I have been to including my town of New Orleans, I have been over charged only in big cities, like Manila, I have travel and lived in central America, where I had to hide behind and under seats of trucks , because I was American, so Phil is very safe, cost is about the same for me, I do support several kids school, and church camp every year, in !arket most know me, that helps, get out and meet everyone,

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samangelevski Banned

292POSTS

8 years ago

#46

gbdermid i have nothing to say about your wife been 40 years younger then you, well done and good for you, we all have younger Wifes much younger then what we are, all I was saying is that I do not like someone to call me daddy if not my child, but if you comfortable with it then is up to you, but remember it is morally wrong.

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bigpearl ViP

4332POSTS

8 years ago

#47

Morally wrong? This is the 21st century, I call my partner baby, he is not my baby, it is a term of endearment, he calls me my man, affection yes. I suppose because we are gay that is morally wrong also to the uneducated and narrow minded?
Some people need to reread their posts especially where their opinions change with the wind and appear to need "moral" support from other contributors.

Cheers, Steve.

6 members reacted to this post

gbdermid Active member

39POSTS

8 years ago

#48

We both think it's ok,, only in city, so others won't pass judgement on us,,and we usually have many of her friends , or family with us, who call me Paw Paw, .Thank you for reply my friend,,her older cousin has just chat me,,for us to visit her family on another island, !, New adventure in my new life,

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bobquinn0801 Member

19POSTS

8 years ago

#49

Hey, Sam, I gotta call you out here. You just posted to another guy that he shouldn't preach his beliefs when he spoke of using his religion to deal with stress. But then you come out here calling something morally wrong.聽 Who's preaching now? It seems that you've taken on the role of deciding what is acceptable on this forum.

My brother's wife calls him "daddy" because he adopted her son from a previous marriage. They are close in age. It is not a "daddy's little girl" situation which you seem to assume about every situation like this.

This is not my style, personally, but I'm not going to judge anyone else's relationship without really knowing the full situation. To each his own.聽 If they treat each other well and are good people, why are they deserving of your judgment?

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Richard Yan Contributor

197POSTS

8 years ago

#50

It's only a name or term. Let's move on馃榿

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samangelevski Banned

292POSTS

8 years ago

#51

ok Guys read it back, i said i do not like to be called daddy and yes i said morally wrong to me, not to you, and I did say if someone comfortable with been called daddy fine with me, every one to its own ways, at the end of it all who really cares, i really do not care what others call you or who, but this is my opinion here, then i get gay on my caes where did that come from, what are gays got to do with daddy, or baby or my man, what the f...

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bobquinn0801 Member

19POSTS

8 years ago

#52

Your words exactly:聽 "but if you comfortable with it then is up to you, but remember it is morally wrong."

That is not saying that it is your opinion for yourself.聽 You are making a blanket statement that it is morally wrong not just to you but for everyone.

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bigpearl ViP

4332POSTS

8 years ago

#53

Sam, you should reread your posts, all of them, on all threads not just this one here, as said your opinions change with the wind and your defences are shallow to say the least.

"gbdermid i have nothing to say about your wife been 40 years younger then you, well done and good for you, we all have younger Wifes much younger then what we are, all I was saying is that I do not like someone to call me daddy if not my child, but if you comfortable with it then is up to you, but remember it is morally wrong."

And then in the next breath in defence:

"ok Guys read it back, i said i do not like to be called daddy and yes i said morally wrong to me, not to you,"

Sam you are most likely a really nice guy but at times we including myself have to learn tolerance and sadly these days political correctness, all our opinions matter and most times diplomacy wins the day.

Cheers, Steve.

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samangelevski Banned

292POSTS

8 years ago

#54

We all make statements one way or the other, if you guys think you never offend anyone we all聽 again, we all do it directly or indirectly, i have nothing to defend my self for, but if you people think that way then, you want to be called daddy then up to you, maybe you deserve it, and by the way you all start to think like and old Man,聽 what happen to people that enoj life and do things for themselves, or was just in your past life ? now that you are someone's daddy, you think that is fine, I guess old Man think alike good luck to you.

Navajo52 Contributor

122POSTS

8 years ago

#55

bigpearl wrote:
Morally wrong? This is the 21st century, I call my partner baby, he is not my baby, it is a term of endearment, he calls me my man, affection yes. I suppose because we are gay that is morally wrong also to the uneducated and narrow minded?
Some people need to reread their posts especially where their opinions change with the wind and appear to need "moral" support from other contributors.

Cheers, Steve.

Exactly right Steve. Gay or otherwise it is simply a loving term of endearment. My wife does the same thing and I have several pet names for her as well.

PS.

Was gonna meet Ron the other day at SM while he was down this way. Ended up with pretty bad abdominal pain for some reason and had to cancel. Hopefully can do it in a few days when he returns.
How soon are you going back to OZ now?

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Silvercobra Contributor

105POSTS

8 years ago

#56

My children call me Daddy but my beloved wife and I refer to each other as My Love or My Dear.
For someone to call the woman they sleep with My Child and her to call him Daddy I find just a little bit weird.
Must raise some eyebrows when overheard at the mall.
Just my opinion and to each his own I guess.

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Navajo52 Contributor

122POSTS

8 years ago

#57

Silvercobra wrote:
My children call me Daddy but my beloved wife and I refer to each other as My Love or My Dear.
For someone to call the woman they sleep with My Child and her to call him Daddy I find just a little bit weird.
Must raise some eyebrows when overheard at the mall.
Just my opinion and to each his own I guess.

I would agree, especially if that mall was outside of the Philippines LOL! Strange the cultural differences between countries. My two daughters I call Angel and Babygirl just as nicknames.
We take our Shih Tzu dog with us to the mall. Guess we will have to figure out a pet name for her as well--that is if my wife has not done so already..

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samangelevski Banned

292POSTS

8 years ago

#58

I will say one more thing about this silly topic and nothing more, we all know and we all call our partners by some pet names, or nicknames, bigpearl i did not say any thing to you by calling your partner baby or my Man, this are normal terms on nicknames or pet names, sweetheart or darling most used in Australia, but this are normal people, I have name for my Wife too I call her my neth she calls me my sam, but not daddy, come on guys how will you feel in public to be called my daddy in front of people, if not your child,
to me sounds like teenage Girl hooked up with a pimp, the only people have or been called daddy is because they are pimps, or sugar daddys.聽 but you guys know about this more than me, we don't have pimps in Australia or sugar daddys.

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Silvercobra Contributor

105POSTS

8 years ago

#59

Go for it Sam
Why鈥檇 you hold back?
Give 鈥榚m both barrels.

Navajo52 Contributor

122POSTS

8 years ago

#60

samangelevski wrote:
I will say one more thing about this silly topic and nothing more, we all know and we all call our partners by some pet names, or nicknames, bigpearl i did not say any thing to you by calling your partner baby or my Man, this are normal terms on nicknames or pet names, sweetheart or darling most used in Australia, but this are normal people, I have name for my Wife too I call her my neth she calls me my sam, but not daddy, come on guys how will you feel in public to be called my daddy in front of people, if not your child,
to me sounds like teenage Girl hooked up with a pimp, the only people have or been called daddy is because they are pimps, or sugar daddys.聽 but you guys know about this more than me, we don't have pimps in Australia or sugar daddys.

My wife and I have been married a long time (15 years) and still live here in the islands. After that long, she can call me anything she wants to.. Makes no difference at all to me. Just be glad we don't live in the States anymore where everyone is offended by everyone else. Such silly stuff.

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samangelevski Banned

292POSTS

8 years ago

#61

you right navajo, me to at home and been married for 5 years, yes she can call me any thing she likes i will never ever get upset with that, but some people are not talking about home but public places, I strongly believe if there is any disputes or arguments between partners must be dealt at home in private place, but some pet names or nicknames are acceptable in public as we know, but some are bit outrages, some not suitable for married people, this you can call it Christian ways.

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bigpearl ViP

4332POSTS

8 years ago

#62

Our nieces, nephews and third cousins twice removed call me daddy whether they are 2 or 50, it is a sign of respect, my better half is also called daddy by his relatives that are 20 or 30 years his senior by a first or second niece or nephew,,,,,, a station in life? Definitely, some call me Tito Steve, some call my better half Tito Benjie but one thing I have learnt is that the general populous of the Philippines show and administer respect.
I had a conversation with one of my better halves nephews 2 weeks ago, he is the same age as my partner, he always calls me Tito or Daddy and I said to him "my name is Steve, you can call me that"
His response was that calling me Daddy or Tito was respectful and if I didn't mind he would continue to name me with respect and little more, very normal.

To be called Daddy in a mall to me wouldn't raise an eyebrow with locals only those with a misconception of a fine culture, one that respects and treats fellow human beings with dignity and an ongoing sense of humility. Something we can all learn from.

Soz for going off topic but feel this contribution is relevant to assimilation to a great country and people.

Cheers, Steve.

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bigpearl ViP

4332POSTS

8 years ago

#63

samangelevski wrote:
you right navajo, me to at home and been married for 5 years, yes she can call me any thing she likes i will never ever get upset with that, but some people are not talking about home but public places, I strongly believe if there is any disputes or arguments between partners must be dealt at home in private place, but some pet names or nicknames are acceptable in public as we know, but some are bit outrages, some not suitable for married people, this you can call it Christian ways.

Christian ways?

I want what you are smoking.

BTW I thought you were married for 2 years or was it 3? honeymoon still.

Cheers, Steve.

Navajo52 Contributor

122POSTS

8 years ago

#64

bigpearl wrote:
samangelevski wrote:
you right navajo, me to at home and been married for 5 years, yes she can call me any thing she likes i will never ever get upset with that, but some people are not talking about home but public places, I strongly believe if there is any disputes or arguments between partners must be dealt at home in private place, but some pet names or nicknames are acceptable in public as we know, but some are bit outrages, some not suitable for married people, this you can call it Christian ways.

Christian ways?

I want what you are smoking.

BTW I thought you were married for 2 years or was it 3? honeymoon still.

Cheers, Steve.

Howdy Again Steve,

Ya know what? Viol and I have been married for 15 years and STILL on our honeymoon.

Will get a PM back to you soon on the other site..

mugtech ViP

4733POSTS

8 years ago

#65

samangelevski wrote:
gbdermid i have nothing to say about your wife been 40 years younger then you, well done and good for you, we all have younger Wifes much younger then what we are, all I was saying is that I do not like someone to call me daddy if not my child, but if you comfortable with it then is up to you, but remember it is morally wrong.

My wife is 5 years younger than me.

expatsteve48 Active member

36POSTS

8 years ago

#66

Sure, you have learned a lot Wilcel...since first posting here.聽 You have to keep the wife and her family happy, with lots of financial support or they will turn on you.聽 Much more the family than your wife, but she will just follow their lead, and you will be SOL.聽

It doesn't matter how far you have traveled for your true love, or how accomplished and educated she is, or how young you are....you gotta give them big money to lose in a business or buy them something to show off to their neighbors to justify sacrificing their daughter to an evil foreigner....that's reality.聽

I did none of that...was a good man, lived a good life...no filipino cares how good you are...if there's no money, you suck.聽 there's a saying here "He's a good man, very generous"...be that guy.聽聽if you want an equal wife , find another country..聽 end of rant....

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Silvercobra Contributor

105POSTS

8 years ago

#67

First off what鈥檚 a SOL. Best I can think of is Single Old Lonley
You must be old enough to remember the Beatles song Money Can鈥檛 Buy Me Love.
Now that鈥檚 inside your head and won鈥檛 go away i鈥檒l tell you a part of my story.
When my beloved was young her father wouldn鈥檛 give her the steam off his poo-poo ( not allowed to say bad words like shit on this site ). even though he was relatively wealthy so she got herself through school without a peso from him which is one of the reasons I love her so much.
These days she is locally known as 鈥渢he Amazona鈥�. Known her for 12years and been married 10. Gosh I鈥檓 still in love.
When I arrived on the scene I was welcomed with open arms and a small interrogation as to my intentions to 鈥渉is daughter鈥�.
I could see my future wife鈥檚 body language and the look in her eyes OMG.
I was polite but even then knew he was not there to be my friend.
After a few tries to get me to help finance his family I too had the same views as my asawa ko. Give him nothing and take him nowhere. And so it鈥檚 been.
I believe if I had forked out the cash and been 鈥� that good man ...very generous 鈥� I would have become the one who financed his chook fight addiction and his penchant for tanduay65. As of today I have become neither and have no intention of changing. See Karma is real and just waiting.
In conclusion if you have to hand out cash to the relies to keep your lover by your side you should ask her how she feels about you and ask yourself do you want to be the family ATM for the rest of your life.
Sorry this took so long. Red Horse made me do it and what a mission proof reading.

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Navajo52 Contributor

122POSTS

8 years ago

#68

mugtech wrote:
samangelevski wrote:
gbdermid i have nothing to say about your wife been 40 years younger then you, well done and good for you, we all have younger Wifes much younger then what we are, all I was saying is that I do not like someone to call me daddy if not my child, but if you comfortable with it then is up to you, but remember it is morally wrong.

My wife is 5 years younger than me.

That's not a bad age difference at all. I'm 66 and my wife is almost 50 so no age related differences that we have found. I do think that in most cases unless the age difference is very large, most people, if committed to a marriage can make it work and be happy.

Marriage takes work all the time and I think if one of the marriage partners is too young (teens or even early 20's) it would be a challenge as most young people are not mature enough to really settle down for the long term. Marriage is that relation between man and woman in which the independence is equal, the dependence mutual, and the obligation reciprocal.

If you want something to last forever, you treat it differently. you shield it and protect it. You never abuse it. You don鈥檛 expose it to the elements. You don鈥檛 make it common or ordinary. If it ever becomes tarnished, you lovingly polish it until it gleams like new. It becomes special because you have made it so, and it grows more beautiful and precious as time goes by.

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Silvercobra Contributor

105POSTS

8 years ago

#69

Thanks for quoting me. Now I feel like I鈥檝e achieved my goal. I know some of my posts have been a bit sooky but I just say it like it is. No bulldust just me.

mugtech ViP

4733POSTS

8 years ago

#70

SOL = Shit outta luck.

Silvercobra Contributor

105POSTS

8 years ago

#71

Oh..
Must try to get out more often Ha..Ha

pej1111 Serial expat

562POSTS

8 years ago

#72

Bob604 wrote:
Here is a passage from Silvercobra's earlier post in this forum.聽聽In my opinion, this is the truest statement in this whole thread.

"Ask yourself why a beautiful young woman, who could basically have anyone she wanted, choose a foreigner older than her father.
Nine times out of ten it is her pathway from poverty and little else.
Her family will agree to the union because with luck they will follow up the same path in her footsteps. "

Hi Bob,

I have a different slant on this and, in relevance to the topic about marriage/relationships with a Filipina.

I left my Ex GF of 4 years last year, she was 25 me 55.聽 I broke her heart, she never did anything wrong by me, I left her for my own personal reasons.

When I left her I left her with a land already bought and more money to build a house, money for medical emergencies, and enough money to keep her in a comfortable live style (18,000php a month for her - 1 person) which as we know is more than enough for 1 person, I have already paid for her college education.

After the 2 years passes I will send her money to maintain the same life style, and I will pay for her siblings college education, and food and college extra's, and accommodation while they are at college.聽 Plus extra for her fathers living costs.聽 After all the siblings have finished college I will continue to support her to the amount of 4,000 php a month, considering at that time she will be 32.

She knows I will support her financially as I have promised.

Now in regards to her attitude of love towards me, when I left I know that she was broken hearted and I know that she still is, so as you can see it is not about the money.

Filipina's see love differently to Western women, yes culture is different here, we are not in Australia or America or the UK, etc, this is the Philippines.

Are there some bad women out there yes.聽 But there are many more genuine ones that if loved will love you back with all there heart.

Regards

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samangelevski Banned

292POSTS

8 years ago

#73

I don't know why bob will put it this way, I really do not believe young Girl is there just because of money, yes sure she can have anyone she wants so can wee, but she chose you not anyone else, maybe you need to ask yourself why this young beautiful Girl chose me, she for sure see some qualities in you, maybe it is the way you talk or walk or how you respect people, this are rare and special qualities a man can have, and no not MONEY, I think most here give them lots less credit than they deserve, I know my situation before and now, everything in time will change it is call probabilities, as they say if it can happen it will happen, means young Girl can Love older Man. and not for MONEY, but then we do read some bad storeys too, as a Man i half belive in them, but then treat it with open eyes and mined. any way as I know this site most of you will say I am naive to think this way, maybe so but I can not change that, but I can tell you one thing that is absolutely true, we all in time will learn to love a person we are with and live with, this will happen and it is not under your control, the same with pej, he is in love with the person and this is why he is committed to support her no matter he is with her or not, this to me is true LOVE. I salute you on this and I hope I can be the same Man.

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gbdermid Active member

39POSTS

8 years ago

#74

thank you, that is what i was told also

Silvercobra Contributor

105POSTS

8 years ago

#75

G鈥檇ay Navajo,
Thanks for the support my friend.
About your dog, is it female or male? If female do you breed her with a dog of the same breed?
What happens to the puppies?
If female you can call it Sue. If male there is only one option.
Take care. Stay happy.

Navajo52 Contributor

122POSTS

8 years ago

#76

Silvercobra wrote:
G鈥檇ay Navajo,
Thanks for the support my friend.
About your dog, is it female or male? If female do you breed her with a dog of the same breed?
What happens to the puppies?
If female you can call it Sue. If male there is only one option.
Take care. Stay happy.

Good morning. It's a female 22 month old Shih Tzu. We decided to not breed her and just have her as a member of the family. My wife has had a lot of fun turning her into a "Mall Rat." She doesn't even know she's a dog anymore.
Strange, this site does not provide a way to upload a photo from a file.

Silvercobra Contributor

105POSTS

8 years ago

#77

Perhaps those who rule the roost can give direction on how to upload images.

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Raggz New member

7POSTS

8 years ago

#78

Hi Navajo,
聽 From your moniker Im guessing you are from USA?聽 If so, can I ask you, is it your SSI that you have direct deposited to Phils bank?
Thanks for any response..

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Navajo52 Contributor

122POSTS

8 years ago

#79

Raggz wrote:
Hi Navajo,
聽 From your moniker Im guessing you are from USA?聽 If so, can I ask you, is it your SSI that you have direct deposited to Phils bank?
Thanks for any response..

Howdy Raggz,

Yes, born and raised in the States. Childhood in Calif and most of my life in Southern Utah.
Yes, I have my US Social Security direct deposited to Metrobank, a local Philippine bank. Note-there are only selected banks here that are authorized by the US to handle Social Security.

We did it this way as it seems to work out better in the long run. No ATM charged to withdraw from our banks ATM's anywhere and just P11 philippine money if using a different banks ATM.Also, if an ATM card is lost, stolen, or stops working it is replaced the same day rather than have a hard time with a stateside bank and long delays. We've been doing it for four years this way now and no issues or problems.

Only downside is that You and ONLY You can access the Social Security Dollar account that you need to open. We have a peso act where the SS is transferred to so my wife or daughter can access the cash from as needed.

Easiest way is to call or email the SS office at the when living here. They make it very simple and easy to get it done and your 1st or next deposit is right on time.

Regards,

Navajo

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